Stronger Voice: Why It’s Really Important as an Introvert to Be Heard

Photo by LinkedIn Sales Solutions on Unsplash

Please note: This page contains affiliate links, meaning I receive commissions from purchases made through those links, at no cost to you

Why do some introverts find it difficult to be heard? We may think that they are easy to dismiss but they just might bring more to a conversation than you may think.

While introverts like it best when they’re alone, I bet you didn’t know or consider that an introvert can show some traits of being an extrovert too. There are those who “crave” the social interactions that they see around them. Sometimes a certain mood of the day or emotion can spark the desire to talk to a group of friends.

That is why expressing yourself as an introvert is just as important as having that alone time. It fulfills the need to be social, no matter how long or short that conversation may be. But when that same person continuously gets cut off or not valued in that conversation, it can grow to frustration.

Being an introvert in the world can be tough

As an introvert, it is tough being in this world. You may argue the point, but society was created with extroverts in mind. You have so many confident people who, as I like to say, steal the spotlight from those who are not as boastful when it comes to socializing. They are more confident within themselves to take hold of any conversation.

And while you want to be heard and show that you have ideas too, some of us may feel that those with a louder persona can put their points across more.

There is nothing wrong with that or anyone being heard. We are social beings, and part of that is listening. But what happens when you’re talked over or dismissed on numerous occasions. That feeling alone can send someone into hiding and grow their frustration.

As thoughtful and logical as we may be, introverts struggle to be heard in this environment, especially if we lack the confidence that many extroverts may have. And that blow of being dismissed can further drive that confidence back inside of you.

Now there are those introverts who can drive a conversation just as much as anyone else. But I’m talking about introverts who often take a step back a lot of the time.

When someone feels that they are continuously unheard, it can bring on the emotions of anger, being misunderstood, and depression. You can suddenly feel as though your value within that conversation is less than the other party.

And that can result in you taking a step back from being an active participant. Or it can anger you to the point where you feel unheard by everyone.

So, what does it mean to be an introvert

According to Healthline, an introvert is someone who is thought to be quiet and reserved. They’re not the attention getters or social butterflies that most extroverts are. As an introvert, you often find that you can do good all by yourself for lengthy periods of time.

Speaking from my own experience, during the COVID quarantine, I was able to not only entertain myself for days but enjoy the time I spent by myself. While introverts may enjoy being by themselves more, they have the same urges as everyone else to be social.

Sometimes too much social interaction can be overwhelming and expend lots of energy. I’m sure you’ve heard someone say that they need to be alone to recharge. It’s because, for many introverts, they feel a sense of being drained after a conversation and need that time away before they can socialize again.

Don’t worry; it’s not something that you did!

So how do you know if you’re an introvert

• You enjoy more time alone than with others
• You prefer to write than talk
• Being around crowds of people exhaust you
• You work alone more than in groups
• Group settings bring on anxiety
• You are self-aware, and take time making decisions
• The thought of committing to gatherings scare you
• Quiet helps you concentrate

These are just a few. I identify myself as an introvert, and while I enjoy my alone time while socializing with others, the last thing I want is to be devalued in my conversations.

Sometimes it can be difficult to get our point across

Introverts can be seen as shy individuals. And as society has taught us, shyness is a form of weakness. But of course, that’s not the case. For shy introverts, they may lack confidence, which doesn’t mean they should never be heard or don’t have anything important to say.

However, because they may not be as outspoken as extroverts, their concerns, thoughts, and their part in a conversation can be instantly cut off or overlooked by others.

But there are a series of things that can make it difficult other than shyness. It could be that the energy it takes to rebut or voice themselves further could be too much for them to manage at that moment. Or it could be that they want to hold back to the end before they speak out.

Or it could even be that they’re so used to being cut off by others that their need to step up in the conversation finally isn’t worth it. It could also be due to anxiety, depression, lack of self-esteem, and more.

These can make it difficult for an introvert to put themselves out there further within a conversation. And unfortunately, that could mean a missed opportunity to let someone know that what you have to say is just as important.

As an introvert it is important to be heard

Loudness is not our strongest trait. And small talk can take a lot out of most introverts. But that doesn’t mean we don’t want to have a conversation or be heard when doing so. Like with any other, having that equal interaction is important.

And when you’re feeling unheard within that conversation, you can start to withdraw from it. When you’re talking with others, that balance of carrying that conversation with them gives you the feeling of being a part of something.

You gain a sense of importance, of value within yourself. You may gain a feeling of accomplishment and sense a change in you which adds to your confidence. And who doesn’t want that? It builds a positive aspect of yourself that you can embrace and continue with others.

This form of balance within the conversation for an introvert can also make them feel present. While we would rather spend more of our time alone, we’d like to feel visible in the moments that we are around others.

Finding your voice to be heard as an introvert

One of the key components of being heard in a conversation is assertiveness. As an introvert, I’m starting to learn that there’s nothing wrong with stepping out of my comfort zone to be heard.

Think of your talking points as a partnership. Work as a team and don’t leave your contribution to a conversation behind.

Even if you’re not as confident or starting to build your confidence because it’s never too late, the smallest step of assertiveness can change a conversation. It can also assist with building that confidence.

When I was younger, I often allowed myself to not be visible in conversations with others because they would cut me off, or the conversation would go in a different direction. So, I would shut down. And I didn’t know how to manage it.

But as I got older, I began to observe others and how they did it. Introverts are good observers. And although it took me a few years further, I began small by starting conversations or jumping into a few. I even began to interject when someone would cut me off to make their point.

And the more I practiced doing it, I started to see my confidence build inch by inch. I was also starting to see what my voice was like. By taking small steps, you can begin the process of building your own voice.

4 tips you can try to bring up the confidence and be heard as an introvert

1. Practice having small conversations with trusted people you know. Start a few of those off where you take the lead first. Doesn’t have to be too intense but something light to begin with.

2. Start to advocate for your thoughts and ideas more. Allow for your thoughts to be valid both inside and outside your mind. There was a reason to speak it aloud so why not continue the follow-through.

3. Don’t stop because someone has cut you off. We’re not perfect so even if someone ends up cutting you off in a conversation, it’s ok. But don’t let that stop you from continuing on. Remember that you have a voice as well and if you feel it’s important, then it is.

4. Jump in when you feel comfortable and go all out. Too much can truly be too much for an introvert. But for those moments where you feel you’ll shine in contributing to a conversation then take that first step of jumping in. You just might bring something to the chat that wasn’t there before.

Conclusion

Your voice speaks volumes for you as an introvert, and it shouldn’t go unheard. With some dedication to building your confidence within conversations, you can gain the growth to be heard. Remember, you were meant to be heard. So, are you an introvert who finds yourself not being heard? Do you have some advice for someone in this situation? Be sure to share your comments below.

Until next time, this is Tammy saying keep strong, keep positive. And NOTHING’s impossible!!!